Tuesday, 11 August 2009

From the department of cultural realisations and differences--

Comes 7 Ways you Can Tell You're in Washington State!

7. You go back to a girl's apartment after a night of flirting and drinking, and that apartment is in Seattle.
6. You and your friend are going for a drive and your friend says "hey are those the Olympics?" and you say "Yes," because they are the Olympics, a Washington State mountain range.
5. Looking on a map you can accurately identify the borders to the area that you are in as the State/Province lines to Idaho, Oregon and British Columbia.
4. When you anger someone and they tell you to "go jump in Puget Sound" it is hyperbole simply because it is unlikely you will do so, rather than technically physically impossible.
3. You were legally allowed to vote for Washington State Governor and State Legislators.
2. You go to a refill station in your HYBRID and there's an ESPRESSO stand and the guy there (who has a BEARD) says "Hey, when I'm not working at the ORGANIC FOOD AND GRANOLA CO-OP, I'm in this really hip GRUNGE* BAND." And you're like "Wow, so AM I! Want to go HIKING and FISHING later? We can RECYCLE TOGETHER! I voted for OBAMA and DON'T LIKE SPORTS THAT MUCH!" and you write a gay-rights referendum together, and call it the TOTALLY GAY RIGHTS REFERENDUM because you still have a sense of humour about how liberal you are.
1. Whilst driving on the freeway you pass a sign that says "Welcome to Washington."


*sic

6 comments:

David said...

I feel like if you were actually in Seattle, with our notorious weather, you would not see the Olympics... or, they would say, "the mountains are out," which is truly a nothwesterneologism.

graham said...

This might be true. Which is why it was a "Washington State" list, not just Seattle. . .

plus I forgot to mention Computers in the catch-all cliche list of no. 2. All in all not my finest work.

Friday said...

I saw this blog and was like... Man, this guy has an awesome since of humor. No wonder Jess likes this! And then I saw it was YOU! ahahhahahah!! And it all made sense. Welcome back to the states, buddy? Fancy a stay in my basement? :)
Love,
Courtney

Friday said...

Oh God, I said "since" instead of "sense." And I get paid to edit papers. Geez...

Katrina said...

I snorted my organic soda and spilled it all over my free range cotton t-shirt when I read #2.

Kat said...

This is the single best blog post I have ever read.