11/30: Knives For Sale

"Why on earth would you ever need a knife?”-- Concerned Younger Sister
“In case I need to stab someone. Duh.”-- Me.

This collection of knives
For sale to not the highest,

                But first

Bidder.

I want them gone. My wrist action

Is tired, I don’t fancy a quick garrotting

Any more.

They are sharp, clean, in good condition,
they should go to someone I know,

Who will use them well.

I’m neither as tough
Nor noble

As I thought.

So here, for  a reasonable-- I’m not
Asking much; pick them up or walk.

We’ve been having this conversation too long.

And either way
You’ll get them.

Top Ten of 2014

10. A noticeable achievement in killer robots.
9. King street station clocktower in the fog.
8. The time a pop star/rapper and we were all outraged, or calling the outrage what it was: something we disagreed with because it seemed to indicate an attitude we disapproved of.

blooorrrrrghphmampharrrrgleshupdtreeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuugh! poi poi poi nooooggggheeeeeephrelmoppskj!!! amph!

7. Krangovers: the specific shame and sickness one has after being up all night creating TMNT memes.
6. A very important Tweet.
5. Inappropriate levels of__ expressed by falling on the floor with a microphone in hand.
4. 86ed.
3. A punch in the gut, a slap in the face, a growing fear for ones life every time the news comes on. Huddled around a working phone, desperately refreshing, in hopes to hear something good.
2. A five-page long dictionary of ambivalent definitions every time someone 'revolutions.'
1. Pizza by the slice in lieu.

this is the only 2014 list there is.