1/30: April First Death Dodger Roulette

911 phone lines
jammed for the
pranksters with the
alien invasions
and escaped zoo
animals running rampage
at the preschool.

Pray the bizarre tragic never
finds you on this calendar day.
Pray the demons in the back of
your grey stuff don't ooze their way
forward on this calendar day.
Pray that nuclear monsters don't
rise from the ocean, roaring
and thrashing, on this day,
with the Coast Guard on high alert
for pranks and faked
footage.

Don't waste your sympathy.
Keep your empathy sealed in Tupperware.
Don't believe everything you read
on the internet.

"Please, this is serious. My friend is crushed under an overturned
popcorn truck. Kernels are everywhere, and there's a terrible
loss of blood. Send help as soon as you can! This isn't a joke,
we don't have much time left."